Editorial: Politics or Performance Art?
Wednesday, 17 March 2010
The grey and rainy weather was a bit off for late February, and I was generally beginning to feel a little disoriented as to where in the year we were. Because it was February, not Christmas panto season, or was it?

‘I will send them home!’

‘Oh no you won’t!

‘Oh yes I WILL!’

‘OH BUT YOU CAN’T!’

‘HAH just you WAIT.

‘I’m UN-suspending them! I’m the APPOINTING AUTHORITY!’

‘But my decision is constitutional!’

‘But I’m CONSTITUTIONALLER than YOU!’

Only one of the mythical beasts, the Two Principals, can be the Appointing Authority, not so? Cue daily newspaper slanging matches between Miguna Miguna (with hat, in the ODM corner) against anyone in PNU. The end of civilisation as we know it was near, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse had purchased a business visa at JKIA, managed to find their luggage, and stomped off down Mombasa Road (if you haven’t seen them yet, that’s because they are stuck in traffic or got waylaid by some thugs. Happens to the best of us).

However, the saga of the immediately unsuspended suspensions was merely the curtain raiser, a teaser, an amuse gueule. On to the main play: Parliament reconvenes. Another round, another try.  The president heroically sets the scene by directing the introduction of open-floor offices in a keen assessment of what the cause of grand corruption is. Enclosed office space it is! I’m glad that several years after John Githongo’s departures, this is finally settled. Get the fundi to remove those walls, and clarity will emerge – once the dust settles, I assume. Because right now, there is an ever louder chorus, a crescendo, from the heaving choir centre stage: The fight against corruption shouldn’t be politicised, and it shouldn’t be personalised!

And that’s where I respectfully disagree with the elected representatives of the people: Go ahead. Please do personalise – because you’ll most likely find it’s persons who do deals, persons who take kickbacks, persons who make off with taxpayers’ money. Presumably attempting to weasel out of that whole personalisation gimmick, William Ruto smugly declared: ‘I will take responsibility when everybody else takes responsibility.’ Yes, sir, we get it: You won’t go down unless you all go down together. And is that a favour that you could possibly do the rest of us? Do politicise all those corruption cases. I want to see the grand coalition throwing mud at each other, clawing at each other, digging up ever more rivals’ corruption cases to show them off proudly, until it’s a blurred haze of maize, oil, free primary education, cemetery soil, … and then, before the elections, they all stand there, clutching the rest of their spoils, and we can all see that they are naked emperors.

In own matters, more performance art: Thanks to an invitations of KTN’s Ramah Nyang, I’ve become a bank apologist – here’s part 1 (about three minutes in), part 2 and part 3. And when you’re done playing around on YouTube, have a look at the stories below.

Have a happy and productive week,
Andrea



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